Dear Friends,
Not to quote a Lifehouse song (because that would be soo 2001 of me) but their song, “The First Time,” really seems to get to me every time. Perhaps because there are rarely “firsts” in life that I secretly think everyone is after “feeling things for the first time.” But due to modern technology, and since our society is run by instant gratification, people are distancing themselves from virgin experiences (not THE experience, but virgin-esque experiences) because they want to set themselves up to expect it. I think that’s why people get obsessed with traveling – you know the difference between the person who’d like to tour Italy one day and the person who buys the $500 flash sale airline ticket and plans a trip for next week. I think these people want to stage feelings of the first time, or if not the first, then to give themselves a better Round Two than experienced the first go-around. And since you can’t control other things (love, jobs, big breaks, random experiences that make life worth living) that is why people love to plan trips – on whim or in time – so they can attempt to control their level of pleasure. I’m not faulting anyone for this, I think it’s awesome and is something I haven’t done enough of, but this idea came to me this morning. Why do people love to do things they’ve never done? Survey says: So they can feel those butterflies that subsequently only happen “for the first time.”
In sports, even being a rookie is a great thing. How young you are when something GREAT happens is monumental to how people view it. Even for me: I’d rather say my book got published when I was 25 than 35. Not even totally because that will mean I will have 10 more additional years to write more books and to gain more credibility but because I want it sooner – I want things sooner. I want to say I was younger when something happened. Or maybe because life does not guarantee us these special experiences tomorrow, or in 10 years. Maybe because I want the instant gratification, or maybe because I want to feel it for the first time younger. I don’t want to wait for years to make the experience better – I somehow don’t think that matters. As long as you get the first-time experience, and better yet, it continues to feel like the first time every time it occurs, then I think that is what our goal should be.
I am looking for a few things in my life that feel like the first time on the 100th time. Anybody else? Life is too short not to feel butterflies on most occasions. Some people call it a spark but to those of you who know me – butterflies suit me better. Besides there’s that saying that “sparks will fade…” so I like to think that what I’m after won’t fade. The electrical charge you feel when your heart drops with excitement and adrenaline (I wish a scientist would name this already so we could all stop writing love songs about the ambiguity of said feeling). This feeling to me, isn’t just associate with love. Maybe people associate it with love because in Biblical times, nobody worked hard for a book deal or I-banking client or televised trial won.
I know it’s unrealistic for me to expect that even these rare, delicacies in life will feel that exciting each time. But, the hope is that the thrill is present most of the time, which goes back to the biggest mystery of life: unpredictability and how we all deal with it. We may not be able to count on a lot, but we should shoot for the stars with experiences that wildly please most of the time, if not all. As long as the spark doesn’t officially go out – keep it lit.
Kisses,
Jessica
