Broadway

Dear Friends,

I am really slacking with my posts. Winter has slowed me down, I suppose. If I were in Smash, trying to get a musical from workshop to the big stage, I would probably fail. I can’t even keep up with my own blog. Sometimes I wish I was trying out for broadway. I was a performer in a different life, I think. I mean, if you ask my close friends, I could still wing it. I’m sort of a triple threat but not in a performer’s way: I’m a friend, aunt and writer. Not a musical does that make. Actually, maybe it does. A musical that would involve a lot of cursing, love and Legoland.

There is just something so appealing about people risking simple sustenance to follow their dreams: to dance and glitter in the spotlight and sing ballads. Is life really all about one moment? Watch the movie The Vow and you will be in the same questionable state I am. Yes, it is quite embarrassing that Channing Tatum “got” to me, but it was more the story, which by the way he was perfectly cast for. He’s like the most attractive outcast there is. The movie is about Rachel McAdams, who gets into a car accident and forgets the last five years of her life. She has to relive it. If that happened to me I would be like FTW (F the world, for those of you not familiar). It would look more like Kristen Whig on an SNL skit, and not an adorable rom-com. I mean, if I had to re-learn/re-live the past five years, it would be horrific. Starting when I was 19, falling in love with the wrong guy, getting my heart trampled on, then again falling for the next wrong guy at 22, a scary heartbreak, then writing my book, struggling in crappy PR jobs, all to end up in New York City working at a publisher, desperately seeking an agent and knowing so much more, but at the same time, not having a clue what my future will be. Oh no, I definitely would not have the energy to relive the past five years. PASS.

Even scarier than not having enough energy to relive your life is that you might take different lessons from each experience. Maybe I wouldn’t be in NYC, maybe I wouldn’t have written my book, maybe I would have met zero wrong guys for me – or ten. Who knows. It makes my head hurt to think about. When I left the movie theater I said to my friend, “Well that wasn’t quite as abusive as The Notebook, but pretty damn close.”

But going back to Broadway, I wish I had an outlet like that every day. I wish that I could have my “moment” every day. Performing, even rehearsing takes so much pizazz. I know writing is my outlet but sometimes I don’t have time for it, and I don’t even have a whole lot going on besides my job. That is sad. That means what will I do when I have more responsibility than I do now?

I think I hear 42nd street calling my name… It has been awhile, hasn’t it? For now, I think I just need to go see a show. I’d even see Rock of Ages at this point, I am so desperate.

Kisses,

Jessica

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